Fandom: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon: Sailor Stars (anime)
Date Finished:
Classification: Alternate Universe, Romance, Angst
Pairing: Seiya/Yaten, Taiki/Ami, Mamoru/Usagi, Haruka/Michiru  
Rating: NC-17

The Long Road
By Elsewhere
elsewherecw@shaw.ca

All other information in Part One.

Part Six: Because Of You

Glossary:
gomen; gomen ne - sorry
konbanwa - good evening
kuso - shit
masaka - impossible; you’re kidding

*****
Left on an eastbound train
Gone first thing this morning
Why’s what’s best for you
Always the worst thing for me
*****

That was probably the most peaceful sleep he’d had in as long as he could remember. He didn’t wake up as often as he was used to, and when he did, he didn’t feel as disoriented as usual. It was like because of the way he had spent the whole day stewing like that, only to talk things over with her at the end of the night and then fall asleep warm and secure in her arms without getting worked up again over sex or fighting or anything else…it was like somehow he’d found the ultimate tension drain or something. Lying there in her arms, tangled between her legs again because it just seemed to end up that way, he really felt about as relaxed as he ever got. And he slept…he really slept. If he had nightmares, he forgot them by the time he woke up.

When he did wake up, it was to her scent. His face was pressed right to her skin, after all, kind of nuzzled right in the curve where her neck met her shoulder. She smelled really fantastic, that same exotic wildflower kind of scent that he’d noticed around her before, but pressed up so close to her like this, breathing it in, it was really incredible. He ended up burying his hands in her hair and pressing closer, his nose nuzzling into her hair as he tried to take in more of the intoxicating fragrance. Even though he was still half-asleep, it was what he felt like doing at the time. And gradually, similarly, she started to respond, moving her body sleepily against his, her hands moving slowly up his back until she hugged herself against him. He could feel her breasts through the T-shirt she’d borrowed, and her hips were kind of grinding against his too, and he felt a little jump of sensation that woke him up a bit more.

Pretty soon it wasn’t enough just to breathe her in like that; he had to taste her. His hands were still in her hair as he made his way down the curve of her shoulder as far as he could, nibbling and sucking, before the T-shirt collar got in his way. Then he moved his hands gently down her sides and moved them under the shirt, stroking her hips before he smoothed his palms over her stomach and made his way upwards. Meanwhile, his mouth explored the hollow at the base of her throat, teasing her further towards wakefulness until she blinked groggily and let out a soft, breathless groan, one hand moving up to his neck, her nails raking lightly at his skin.

He rolled the T-shirt upwards until her breasts were exposed, and just as she started to squirm slightly, probably feeling cold, he lowered himself and started sucking on one of her nipples. So the other breast wouldn’t feel neglected, he cradled it in his hand and rolled the nipple between his fingers, listening to her breathless responses and loving the way she lifted her knees and clasped them against his sides.

After he’d done the same to the other breast, he noticed the way she was moving her hips restlessly, so he decided it was time to move on. He dropped a hand to cup her through her panties and was surprised by the moisture he could feel even through the fabric. That settled that…he got rid of the obstruction quickly and settled himself down between her legs, listening carefully to the beautiful timber of her moans as he put his mouth to work once again. This, the ultimate experience of her scent and her taste…he set to it gratefully, closing his eyes as he savored the experience, and she seemed to enjoy it too, if the way she grabbed at his hair and cried out loud was any indication. He had learned from the last time too, and he learned more this time about what she liked; it wasn’t too long before she was shivering, her hands twisted in the sheets now as she fought to catch her breath.

He sat up and licked his lips as he looked down at her, somehow pleased to see her like that, looking so exhausted by his efforts. It took her a moment before she could open her eyes again and look up at him, and her eyes looked hazy, kind of drunken.

"Gods, Seiya…your mouth…are you sure you haven’t been practicing this?" she murmured between deep breaths, and he grinned slightly.

"I swear," he said, lifting his hands. "I haven’t touched a woman in months…and it’s never been like this. But…I feel like I know what to do with you, Yaten."

He told her the truth honestly, tilting his head to show his own confusion.

"Mm…" was her only reply to that as she slowly struggled upright. She gestured with her chin towards him and smiled. "Your turn, then."

He glanced down at himself, saw what she was looking at---the really noticeable tent in his pajama bottoms---and blushed a bit.

"Eh…that’s all right…I did that just now because I wanted to. You don’t have to do anything. I know, what you said last night…maybe I shouldn’t have just…"

"Never mind," she said, shaking her head as she reached across to the night table and snatched up the condom they hadn’t used the night before last. She held it up and shook it slightly. "Here."

He shook his head hesitantly, her boldness making him feel even more shy about the matter, so she sighed, put aside the condom for the moment, and then…she sort of attacked him, or at least that’s what it felt like to him. The next thing he knew he was on his back on the bed and she was straddling him, shoving off his pajamas, and her mouth was everywhere…on his face, on his neck, and then on his bare chest. He tried to catch her hands, not so much because he wanted to stop her but because he felt like he should do something, and she finally let him when she leaned down and kissed him, and it felt like they were wrestling, their hands exerting force against each other, almost like a midair arm wrestle, while they kissed, probably the most passionate kiss they’d shared yet. When she pulled away he couldn’t breathe---he just lay back against the bed, staring at the ceiling, while she pulled off his pajama bottoms, and then her hands were rubbing his arousal, massaging him, and he closed his eyes, biting his lip.

"So…?" she murmured after a moment, and in answer he struggled upright and grabbed her in a sudden bear hug, kissing her fiercely as he pressed her back against the bed. She didn’t fight, but she did flail out a bit as she searched the bed for wherever she’d left the condom. But he hadn’t actually forgotten it, and he found it first, their searching fingers clashing and sliding together for a moment before he grabbed the little plastic package and pulled it over towards himself. He paused in their kiss for a moment, breathing harshly against her neck and listening to the sound of her rough breath as he fumbled with the package between their slick bodies and finally got it open and got the condom on. Her hands reached down to check it, making him shiver with the warmth of her hands around his length, and then she helped guide him inside. Within seconds he was there, as far as he could go, struggling to move farther, and he was kissing her again, moaning his pleasure into her mouth and swallowing her own moans in return as they moved towards the end together.

When it was over, he somehow had ended up on his back with her lying half on top of him, her finger tracing lazy patterns over his chest as she breathed sleepily against his neck. He wasn’t sure how they’d ended up that way, although he vaguely remembered that during the last few thrusts they’d somehow ended up kind of wrestling around on the bed, as though the passion frenzy had made them too restless to stay in one position.

He blinked when he felt her hand suddenly still against his chest as she leaned up and looked over at the clock, her elbow digging into his ribs.

"Kuso…I’m going to be late again," she muttered, letting out another whispered curse as she rolled over and out of bed, her bare feet padding softly against the hardwood of his bedroom floor. "You need to get an alarm, Seiya."

"I have one, in the clock-radio," he said, watching her as she once again left his bedroom stark naked.

"Then remind me to set it," she called back. "I’m using your shower."

He couldn’t do anything but shrug and let her do what she wanted when she gave him that tone. He didn’t feel like going back to sleep though when she was still there, just a couple of rooms away, so he got up and got dressed and poured himself some cereal, settling in to watch some TV, though truthfully he listened more attentively to the sounds coming from the shower, like the way the sound of the water changed when it was hitting skin as opposed to tile.

She came out a few minutes later, wrapped in one towel and drying her hair with another.

"Lemon shampoo, Seiya?" she said questioningly, lifting her hair and sniffing at it a bit delicately.

He shrugged one shoulder, pretending to be totally focused on the TV.

"It’s what the hospital had," he said, as though that explained everything.

"Hm…I’ll buy you some new stuff," she said as she disappeared into his bedroom, and through the door he could see her silhouette as she got dressed.

"Why?" he called to her.

"Because it would do you good to have something other than ‘what the hospital had’," she answered simply as she came out of his room, still working at drying her hair. She went back into the bathroom then, and he watched as she pulled her hair back into a wet ponytail and hung the two towels in the bathroom.

"Okay…I’m off," she said, grabbing her purse and making her way to the door. She turned back to give him a little wave and a smile. "See you later."

"You really can’t stay?" he asked.

Her smile faltered a bit and she shook her head.

"Seiya…I have to work," she said, and then she opened the door. "Ja ne."

And she left.

He waited there in silence for probably about five minutes before he made a decision, a really sudden decision that actually changed a lot of things for him. It was the first time he’d ever followed anyone quite like that, but he had no idea it was going to end up becoming such a useful habit.

*****

At first it seemed like an innocent enough idea. He just wanted to test things out, after all. A guy like him who wasn’t even sure whether he was real or whether the world around him only existed in his mind could never be too sure, and he’d wondered so many times whether he was just making her up---whether she was some kind of delusion or diversion or whatever they called it. So it seemed like if he could follow her and see that she really did have a real job, and other people interacted with her too, then he could be more sure about it. And besides, what about all her claims that she knew him from before…maybe he could find some proof of that too.

So all he did was he left his apartment a few minutes after her, and he spotted her pretty quickly down the street, at a bus stop. Well, he couldn’t get on a bus with her…she’d see him right away. So he got on a taxi and told it to follow the bus, even though the taxi driver seemed a little suspicious about that, so he told the driver he was just trying to surprise someone at her work place but he didn’t know where it was. It was kind of the truth. So the taxi followed the bus and he watched as she got off at a stop quite a ways across town. He paid the taxi driver and walked down the street, keeping an eye on her, and finally saw her enter a really ritzy-looking building. He approached the building with some hesitation, and then he noticed the address looked familiar. A glance at the business card he’d stashed in his pocket told him why: this was indeed her workplace, the one on her card. It was a photography studio, just like it said on her card that she was a professional photographer. He wondered what kind of photographs she took. Somehow…it was kind of different from what he’d imagined of her. Then again, everything he imagined of her always seemed to end up so different.

In fact, when he thought about it, he still knew absolutely nothing about her except for her name, really. The fact that it was there on the business card seemed to indicate that her name was real at least. And it seemed she was a photographer for a living. But that didn’t really tell him anything about *her*. How old was she? What were her hobbies? What did she like to eat? Maybe she was a vegetarian, and he’d fed her hamburger that one time.

But it could be way worse than that. She claimed to know him from before, and to want to help him regain his memory and all of that. But how was he supposed to believe that? She was so forceful about it, but why? What could she get out of the deal? If sex hadn’t even been her intention---if he could even believe that---then what? What did she really want from him in return for this ‘help’ she was offering? And why hadn’t she told him anything more about who she was, and how they supposedly knew each other in the past? Now that he thought about it, it was all really, really suspicious. Thoughts of all the different possibilities in this situation spun through his brain, making him dizzy.

Before he really thought about it, he found himself walking up the stairs and going into the building, ignoring the people at the reception desk area and going down some kind of hallway until he heard a loud voice saying something kind of interesting and he turned, looking into a big room…a studio. Even he could recognize that instantly. All these big lights and screens were set up, and people were running around all over the place.

"Yat-chan! You’re late again…where were you!?" the loud voice he’d heard was saying, and he looked up, just in time to see Yaten suddenly disappear into the embrace of a really energetic blonde woman, a couple of inches taller than her. This woman, blonde and blue-eyed like something out of a picture book, instantly spelled out the word ‘g-e-n-k-i’ in his mind.

"Gomen ne, Mina-chan…I won’t do it again, I promise," Yaten’s low voice cut in as she grabbed the blonde’s arms and pushed her away gently. He watched this with fascination.

"Yes, but *what* exactly were you doing?" the blonde demanded, and then she gasped as she pulled back the light scarf Yaten was wearing around her neck. He strained forward to see what had caused her reaction and felt a light blush touch his cheeks when he saw the large hickey standing out against Yaten’s neck. "Yat-chan!! What were you doing!? And with whom!? And without me!?!?"

Yaten chuckled as she covered her neck again, a hand self-consciously holding the scarf in place as she patted the blonde’s arm.

"I’ll tell you some other time, Mina-chan," she said wryly, and then she gestured forward. "Come on…let’s get started."

He probably would have stood there forever just watching as Yaten moved forward and was handed a camera by someone, was immediately stopped by a few other people she stopped to talk to, and while the blonde fluttered around, sometimes clinging to Yaten’s arm and other times just hopping at Yaten’s heels like an obedient dog: obviously a fan.

"Hey…you there."

He blinked, the sudden sound of a voice next to him breaking him out of his catatonic state, and he glanced down at the woman who was standing next to him, looking up at him.

"Why are you standing there, young man? Are you here to work? If you’re here to model, you’re in the wrong place to get ready…you just go down the hall and…"

"Oh…no," he interrupted, trying not to fidget. "I’m not a model or anything like that."

"Oh…?" the woman answered, lifting her eyebrows. "Then what can I help you with?"

"I’m just looking for someone," he said, and he reluctantly held up the precious business card. The woman blinked.

"Goodness…well, she’s right over there, honey," the woman said, pointing off to one side. Even as she spoke, the woman turned and called out into the studio, "Yaten-san, there’s someone here to see you."

The murmurs started instantly, within moments filling the room. He caught the gist of them immediately: he was the first man to ever come here looking for her. That made him feel really self-conscious as he strode towards her.

"I have to talk to you," he said quietly, meeting her eyes.

First she looked surprised, and she wasn’t the only one; the blonde from earlier suddenly brought a hand up to her mouth and gasped loudly, and he glanced at her, surprised by the knowing look in her eyes as she stared at him. Then he turned back to Yaten, who now looked annoyed as she handed her camera to her nearest assistant.

"Mina-chan, we’ll take ten minutes," she said quietly towards the blonde, who looked between him and Yaten quickly before letting out another sound of surprise.

"But…Yaten…"

"Minako," Yaten replied, her voice rough as she turned to fix her hard green eyes on the blonde. "We’ll take ten."

"A…all right," Minako answered, her hands clasped uneasily against her chest as she watched Yaten lead Seiya away towards her office. He glanced back towards her a couple of times, still surprised by that kind of pained look in her eyes.

His attention turned fully back to her when the office door shut behind them and the two of them were alone. Her office was really bare, with no pictures or anything; no signs of a personal life.

"That girl…" He began, gesturing to the door, and Yaten glanced up at him as she took a seat behind her desk and leaned back in her seat.

"Ah, Minako-chan? Do you recognize her? She’s quite a popular idol these days, after all," she said calmly, gesturing to the seat across from herself, which he accepted.

"No…I don’t really recognize her," he said, shaking his head. "But she seems to recognize me."

"You were once quite an idol yourself," she said ambiguously, and then she fell silent, considering him for a few seconds before she sighed quietly. "Well, I’m sure you didn’t come here to talk about Minako."

"No," he agreed, glancing down at his hands where he’d clasped them in his lap.

"Why are you here?" she asked, a touch of irritation surfacing in her tone now. "I told you I had to work, Seiya. I was aware that you followed me here and I didn’t mind, but to interrupt me while I’m working is a different story."

"You…knew I followed you?" he echoed, staring at her.

"You weren’t very careful," she replied, narrowing her eyes and smiling slightly. "And I’m used to this sort of thing. Now, Seiya…we only have eight minutes left."

"Well…it’s just…I was thinking," he began, glancing at her before looking back down at his hands. He had decided to just spill it and see what she had to say about it. "Thinking about how you said we knew each other before and that you want to help me regain my memories."

"Yes?" she said questioningly.

"And no matter how much I argued against you, you still said you wanted to do that, and I don’t understand it," he said, frowning a bit. "Because…I don’t even really know who you are. It occurred to me…that that’s dangerous, that I don’t even really know you. Why should you want to do all that for me? What’s in it for you?"

He cleared his throat.

"It seems like it isn’t sex…" he said, shifting a bit in his seat.

"Correct," she said simply, her smile widening slightly. "Although it has been the best of my life."

He felt his cheeks go hot, but didn’t reply.

"So I was thinking about it…and who could you be? Maybe you’re some kind of stalker…"

Her eyebrow twitched slightly, but it wasn’t until later that, even after following her all the way to her workplace like that, he would realize the irony of saying that.

"…or maybe even one of those, you know, black widow killers or whatever they call them…women who lure in men and kill them…maybe you’re so interested in me because you’re grooming me as your next victim or something…"

He had to stop talking then, because she was laughing too loud for him to hear himself think, which, it occurred to him, was probably a good thing.

"Well damn, Seiya…what am I supposed to do now that you’ve discovered my secret identity?" she exclaimed, and he glared at her.

"Don’t make fun of me! I’m serious! How am I supposed to know I can trust you!?"

"You don’t; that much is true," she answered, wiping at the tears her laughter had produced, her expression slowly relaxing into a smile, one of those beautiful smiles he’d come to enjoy seeing so much. "You don’t know you can trust me. But that’s the point, isn’t it? I want you to get to know me again, in the hope that you’ll come to trust me. Honestly, I don’t even mind how you do it. If stalking me around like you did today makes you feel better---if seeing me lead my life normally---not the life of a black widow---makes you feel better, go ahead."

"Fine, but that doesn’t change the fact that there are no altruistic deeds," he said, frowning. "What’s in this for you? If you want to help me so much and all that."

She smiled softly and tilted her head, then sighed.

"You’re right…there are no altruistic deeds, and this one isn’t either. I do have ulterior motives. But it’s not sex and it’s not murder or anything else of the sort," she said, her tone becoming gentle as she ran a hand through her hair and considered him in silence for a moment. Her eyes were shimmering again. "Seiya…has it ever occurred to you that perhaps I simply valued your friendship so much that I would do anything to have it back? That to not have that relationship in my life…to not have *you* in my life…has been like having a part of myself missing? Something essential. Has it occurred to you that if it were that important to me…if you meant that much to me…that I would do anything, *give* anything, to get you back?"

Obviously that left him sitting in a totally stunned silence for a couple of moments, while she composed herself, catching her breath and wiping her eyes, even though the tears hadn’t managed to push their way past her defenses this time.

"You’re saying you…cared about me that much?" he asked after he’d regained his voice, staring at her, unable to look away from her bright green eyes.

She smiled.

"I do," she said, switching the tense just deliberately enough that he felt a light shiver move down his spine.

Then she waved a hand in the air.

"Now it’s time for you to go," she said, her voice becoming forceful. "Ten minutes is up, and I *have* to get to work, so you have to go, Seiya."

"Wait…" he began.

"Seiya…" she warned him, getting to her feet.

"No…I won’t keep you," he said, also getting up and touching her arm. He held her eyes, taking a deep breath before he took the plunge, his heart pounding. "I just want to say…I…I kind of believe you. Or rather, I’ll try to believe you. And…I’ll give it a try. Whatever you want to do to try to get my memory back, I mean. I’ll try, for you."

She caught her breath, staring up at him, and then nodded, grabbing his hand and kissing his knuckles lightly before she opened the door and shooed him out.

"All right, Mina-chan…break’s over," Yaten said, clapping her hands to get the blonde’s attention, although it didn’t seem necessary. The blonde jumped to her feet as soon as they left Yaten’s office.

"Yat-chan! Are you…"

"Later, Mina-chan," Yaten said, holding up a hand, and although Minako fell silent, she looked really restless, and she kept watching him as he left, which really made him feel uneasy.

*****

Because she had in essence given him permission to, and because it seemed like it was so easy---even if he did suck at it, as she’d commented---he ended up following her after she finished work that day. He’d spent the day hanging around that street, acquainting himself with the stores and cafes along the block. But he made sure to go back to the building pretty early, and he loitered around in the shadows for a while until she finally came out. He made his way out into the light then, briefly, long enough to ask her if she wanted to get something to eat with him.

"I’m sorry, Seiya…I have plans today," she said, without showing any particular reaction to his sudden presence. "Maybe tomorrow?"

And she left, so he decided to follow her, just like that. To his surprise, she didn’t go to a restaurant or to anyone’s apartment. Instead, she made her way to a park in the nearby Juuban area, and it was there, on a grassy hill with a nice view of the river, that she met her dinner date. This time it was a pretty, sporty-looking girl, slightly taller than him, he figured, and possibly wider-shouldered too. The girl had evergreen eyes and brown hair pulled up into a ponytail on the back of her head, and she was carrying a basket…a picnic basket, he realized, just as he watched the girl give Yaten a hug before the two of them started setting out a blanket to sit on. He settled himself behind a tree to watch.

The two of them seemed pretty close, although this girl didn’t cling to Yaten or say anything embarrassing the way the blonde from before had. They just seemed really at ease together, like ‘friends’, which was a concept he wasn’t terribly familiar with. It was interesting to watch it in action, especially since Yaten looked kind of different from usual while she was sitting there, enjoying her dinner and her friend’s conversation. She seemed almost relaxed, not sad or worried at all, and she smiled a few times---even laughed once or twice. It was really beautiful…she was really beautiful. The longer he stood there, the more he realized he really liked watching her like this, when he didn’t have to worry about her talking to him and commanding him and expecting things of him. When he could just admire her and see her living out her life, free of…well, free of the burden that he must have been to her, he realized was the pattern of his thoughts. Once he realized that, he felt a little less enthusiastic, but his depression started to fade soon enough once he caught a glimpse of another of her smiles. They seemed so rare and precious; each smile was a little hesitant, almost a little strained, as though she wasn’t used to smiling. He wondered if maybe she’d just recently learned how to do it.

The other girl was interesting too. Who was she, and how did she know Yaten? He was almost jealous to see someone interacting so easily with Yaten like that, and it really did make him curious. He wanted to see more of this type of thing…did she have other friends that she would let down her guard around like this? Because that’s really what it felt like…that the Yaten he was watching was someone soft and kind, not quite the same woman he had first met.

He couldn’t hear their conversation from his place, but watching was enough for now. He wished he could hear what the brunette was saying that made Yaten smile and laugh like that---more than that, he wished he could make her smile and laugh like that, as though she was comfortable and free. These thoughts plagued him as he watched until after the sun started going down.

*****

"Yaten-chan! Konbanwa!"

Yaten looked up, broken out of her silent reverie by the sound of the familiar voice.

"Ah, Mako-chan…there you are," she said, waving. "You’re late!"

"Gomen, gomen!" Kino Makoto apologized as she waved and jogged over, a huge picnic basket over one arm and a blanket over the other. "We had a disaster in the kitchen and I had to stay late to clean it up…your cell was off so I couldn’t reach you."

"Ah…sorry about that," Yaten said with a smile as she waited until Makoto had put down the picnic basket, then stepped into the taller girl’s arms to receive the offered hug. "I haven’t been using the phone lately…you can get me on the communicator if you need to."

"I don’t usually use it for personal communications," Makoto said a bit brusquely before she stepped back and looked closely at Yaten’s face. "You look even paler than usual, Yaten-chan."

"Do I? Funny…I slept quite well last night," Yaten said, placing a hand to her cheek.

"Mm…Minako-chan called me and probably everyone else in a kind of frenzy," Makoto remarked in response to Yaten’s comment, and Yaten grimaced.

"Ugh," she said simply, and Makoto laughed as she offered Yaten one end of the blanket to spread out on the grass. Yaten took the blanket, but Makoto watched with some amusement as Yaten took on the task, being ever so careful not to let her clothes or her precious skin touch the grass.

Yaten settled herself onto the blanket with a soft sigh.

"I suppose you’re curious," Yaten said, turning to narrow her eyes at her friend, who chuckled as she opened the picnic basket and started to pull out several bentou boxes.

"I’m a willing ear if you want to talk to someone; that’s all," Makoto said simply, giving Yaten a gentle smile as she offered a bentou.

"Thanks," Yaten said tiredly as she accepted the food, but Makoto noticed instantly the way she picked at it half-heartedly, her attention focused on the river and the slowly setting sun.

"You seem awfully down-hearted," Makoto said, her forehead creasing with concern. "Are you sure there’s nothing you want to talk about? Or maybe something I could help with?"

"No…there’s nothing you can help with," Yaten said, closing her eyes and smiling, a small, tired smile. "I’ve gotten myself into a situation of my own making and I will find the proper way around it, but thank you for your concern."

Makoto picked through her own bentou for a moment, listening to the soft burbling of the water and the rustling of the trees around them, before she cleared her throat and said quietly, "Does this have anything to do with the fact that we’re being watched?"

Yaten lifted an eyebrow towards Makoto.

"Well, it doesn’t make me self-conscious, if that’s what you mean, although I suppose for his sake I should try to be a little more animated…and for yours, since you came all the way out here to spend some time with me, which I thank you for. But as for him, I intend to let him just do as he pleases as long as he doesn’t make a fool of himself or me."

"He?" Makoto asked, now very curious. She tried not to tense too much, not to let her building sense of excitement show.

"Who else?" Yaten said nonchalantly, sniffing before focusing on her food.

Makoto’s eyes widened and she dropped her chopsticks into the bentou box.

"Are you telling me that right now, Seiya-kun is…?" Makoto whispered, turning around, her gaze moving towards a particular tree from which she’d sensed the strange energy.

"Don’t look at him!" Yaten hissed abruptly, and Makoto turned back to face forward with all the quick response of a soldier obeying orders.

"Sorry," Makoto whispered, and Yaten couldn’t help but chuckle, both at herself and at Makoto’s sheepish response.

"No, I’m sorry…I didn’t mean to snap like that…it’s just that, like I said, I want him to have his fun watching us…I don’t want him to know that we know he’s there. He’ll feel too self-conscious and he’ll leave," she explained, unable now to help the smile that dimpled her cheeks. Makoto watched her face carefully, a smile of her own gradually quirking her mouth.

"You’re telling me he thinks he’s hidden? But he’s so obvious!" Makoto whispered, and Yaten chuckled, nodding.

"I know." Then her face grew serious again. "He has retained very few of his skills…just traces of them, really. But inside, he’s still the same person…still as stubborn and stupid as ever."

"Ouch," Makoto said with a laugh, shaking her head. "Is that really how you feel?"

"To a certain extent," Yaten said with a smirk. "I’ve known him longer than you, don’t forget. I have the right to say those sorts of things."

"No doubt," Makoto agreed with a nod. "And I can sympathize…I certainly feel that way about some of my friends sometimes. But Seiya-kun was always so…"

"So…what? Tall, dark and handsome?" Yaten suggested, rolling her eyes.

"Well…yes. So what?" Makoto said, chuckling. "Although I always did prefer Taiki."

"I know," Yaten said with a shake of her head. "All you girls and your Lights obsessions."

"We couldn’t help ourselves and I don’t think you can blame us…you guys were the greatest," Makoto said with a reminiscent sigh as she drew her knees up to her chest. "I miss those days."

"Believe me…so do I," said Yaten, for a moment sounding bitter.

Makoto was silent for a few minutes, seeming to consider her words very carefully before she spoke again.

"How’s it going?" she asked quietly. "I mean…with him."

"No real progress yet, if that’s what you mean," Yaten said, her eyes again focused somewhere out on the river. "We’ve barely begun. Today he remarked that he’s starting to trust me. I was beginning to think we’d never get to that stage."

Makoto was surprised when the next thing Yaten did was break out in giggles, but she understood quickly when Yaten told her about Seiya’s earlier comments about Yaten as a black widow killer or a stalker.

"Just the thought is hilarious!" Makoto cried as she clutched her stomach, laughing.

"Although I did consider murder a few times back in those days when we always had fangirls following us," Yaten said, grinning as she settled herself more comfortably against the blanket. "I’ve almost forgotten those days, though…somehow, little frustrations and irritations like that all came to seem so insignificant after it happened. When he was gone…"

"And you still feel like that?" Makoto asked curiously.

"I don’t know how I feel," Yaten admitted with a self-directed patient smile. "At the moment, I try not to think about my own feelings too much. I suppose…I’m caught in a kind of limbo. And perhaps that was a mistake, which has led to this…situation."

Makoto looked a bit clueless, so Yaten waved her hand.

"Never mind. As I said earlier, it’s my own problem and I’d prefer not to discuss it."

"Sure. But you know where to find me if you change your mind," Makoto said easily enough, and Yaten smiled and nodded, genuinely glad for the offer. Makoto reached into her basket and pulled out something round and fascinating, and Yaten’s eyes lit up. "Now…how about some cake?"

"Well…you know usually I don’t indulge…but for your cake, Mako-chan…I would *always* make an exception," Yaten said with a wink as she nodded her acceptance.

They passed the rest of the evening until the sun was setting just like that, talking and laughing and eating cake until Yaten felt her troubles sliding to the back of her mind, and she almost wished she could stay like this with Mako-chan forever, not worrying about anything.

But just after sunset, the mood was broken, just like that, by the arrival of a familiar face. He slipped into their midst quietly, moving through the shadows of the park with perfect silence and grace until he was standing next to Yaten.

"Good evening," he said simply, bowing slightly at the waist to each of them in turn.

"Taiki-san…good evening," Mako-chan said, surprised by his sudden arrival, although of course she’d noticed his approach. "I’m afraid you’ve just missed dinner, but…"

"That’s fine, Makoto-san, but thank you…I came to pick up Yaten," Taiki answered with a smile that as usual revealed nothing of the processes going on behind his somewhat cold lavender eyes.

"To pick me up? You didn’t have to do that," Yaten said, glancing up at Taiki with a mild smile that spoke of layers of private communication that Makoto knew she could never hope to understand, and judging by the way Taiki responded with a somewhat abrupt glance back towards Yaten that made her look down at her lap and not look back up, Makoto knew that Yaten’s message had been received and returned.

"Great, then…I guess I’ll leave it to you to make sure she gets home safe," Makoto said, gathering up things into her picnic basket. She had the clear feeling that she had become a third wheel of some type in a matter of seconds.

"What about you, Mako-chan…you’ll be all right?" Yaten asked, looking mildly concerned.

"Do you even have to ask?" Makoto asked with a chuckle, flexing her impressive biceps before she hefted up her picnic basket and started on her walk home, waving back towards them. "Good luck with everything, Yaten-chan!"

"Thank you," Yaten called back, and then she blinked as she glanced down at the blanket she was still lying on. "Ah, Mako-chan, your…"

"I think she meant to leave it," Taiki commented, offering down a hand. Yaten took it with some reluctance, allowing him to help her up. She spent some time brushing herself off even though the grass and bugs and so on had never once touched her. Taiki watched this process patiently, and when she’d finally stepped off the blanket and into her shoes he helped her fold it.

"You can return it later," he finished simply as he handed her the folded blanket. She cradled it to her chest almost defensively, still refusing to look into his eyes despite how steadily he stared at her, trying to catch her gaze. "That way you can’t hide away from her too long; you’ll have to see her again soon."

"Interesting theory, Taiki…I don’t usually hear you analyze people’s motives quite like that," Yaten commented quietly, still staring at her feet.

"Perhaps I’m in the analytical mood," he said without missing a beat, taking a step forward, firmly into her personal space. "Yaten, would you care to tell me why you won’t look at me? And perhaps why for the first time in several weeks I had that old sense that a fellow Starlight---that being you---needed my help?"

"I don’t want to tell you, actually, no," Yaten said with a frustrated sort of chuckle as she stepped forward and, in a resigned sort of way, leaned her forehead against his chest. "But I have to. Taiki…I’ve done something I shouldn’t have, and now I’m stuck with it."

She lifted her head and turned away from him, taking a few steps forward towards the river until she was standing next to the railing. Her fingers curled around the metal, tightening until her knuckles went white.

"I didn’t know how difficult it would be to be close to him," she said quietly, a bit angry with herself. "And…I didn’t know I was…so weak."

He looked at her for a moment in silence, obviously not understanding, before his eyes slowly widened and he took a step towards her, his eyes falling to her hand, so tightly gripping the railing to the point that her hand must have been in pain.

"Masaka…" he whispered, and then he glanced at her face, pinched with self-directed irritation.

She nodded.

"I never intended for it to happen, but it did," she said, her lips twisting in an ironic little smile. "I should have foreseen that I would be the one to throw a wrench in my own little plans. But Taiki…"

She turned towards him, closing her eyes and sighing quietly, showing her exhaustion.

"…I’ve been running this over and over in my head and…I know why it’s wrong but…it doesn’t feel wrong when it happens…oh gods," she whispered, turning back to stare at the river again, once more looking angry with herself. "Maybe we made the wrong choice…maybe I shouldn’t be doing this. Maybe you would have been a better choice after all."

It took him a moment to respond. He still felt a little bit in shock.

"No," he said firmly, putting a hand on her shoulder and waiting until she looked up at him before he continued. Her eyes were big, looking for some kind of reassurance. "Yaten…I still believe you’re the only correct choice. You’re the only one with the competence to do this. And you do what you have to do, as I’ve said before. If this…is part of that, then that’s how it will be."

"But how can I be certain?" she asked, looking about as uncertain as she ever had.

"There are no certainties in life," he answered simply, and she sighed, once again leaning forward to rest her forehead against his chest. This time he closed his arms around her protectively, holding her against him until she snuggled a little closer, gratefully accepting the embrace.

"Sometimes I hate you, Taiki. I don’t want you to be my friend; I want you to give me all the answers," she said, in a tone of sardonic, entirely self-directed bitterness.

"I’m sorry; you’ll have to make do with the one. I don’t have the capacity for the other," he said, resting his chin against the top of her head and listening as she chuckled quietly.

"Taiki…"

"Mm?" he murmured, gently stroking her hair as she slowly started to relax in his arms.

"Take me somewhere where we can talk alone…without him watching," she whispered, and she felt Taiki nod against the top of her head. They’d both been aware of Seiya’s presence all along, but Taiki was just as good as her at pretending he wasn’t there. But he also seemed to understand readily enough that she’d had enough for one night.

Within moments they were gone, as though they’d never been.

*****

Seiya watched everything that happened after the appearance of the brown-haired man with interest and an increasing sense of jealousy. At first, when the man and Yaten were just talking, Seiya only felt a bit left out, and again he kind of wished he could hear what they were talking about. But then, when things started to get more intimate between Yaten and the other man, Seiya’s feelings started to change.

He watched as Yaten moved to the railing to look out at the river, and he watched as the man followed her. He watched as they spoke some more, and he noticed that Yaten seemed upset. And then it happened…Yaten turned towards the man and leaned her head on his chest. She’d done that once before, but only briefly and she’d straightened up away from him so quickly that Seiya had been able to kind of pretend he hadn’t seen it, or that it was some kind of fluke. But this time, Yaten just kept her head there, and then the man was holding her…holding her really close to his body, and stroking her hair, and saying something to her really close to her ear, and even resting his chin on the top of her head. Those were things Seiya had never done with her. The kind of intimate things that longtime lovers did.

It was there again, that burning bitterness in his stomach, but he felt as though it had spread. His whole body seemed to be hot with some kind of horrible, burning feeling. He knew part of it was jealousy. But part of it was something else that finally exploded into a terrible mixture of fear, anger and resentment when he saw them disappear. Just like that, the two of them disappeared, as though out of thin air. One minute Seiya was watching them hold each other like that, and then the man held up his trench coat for a second, turned on his heel…and they vanished. How they did it Seiya wasn’t sure, but either way they were gone, and they’d left *together*. That was the significance of it for him.

It took him the entire time it took to walk and bus home to figure out the name for the feeling that was eating him alive. Betrayal. It was betrayal. Real betrayal this time, not like what he’d called betrayal before. And it was the cruelest thing he’d ever known.

*****

END PART SIX